Vang Vieng is a small town in Northern Laos with a dark history. I spent three days in Luang Prabang, recovering from the slow boat and adjusting to a new currency, new language, new culture and new foods. I caught the bus. I got the bus with some of my newest friends/roommates Luke, Freddie, Meredith and a German couple Susie and Rob, plus an Austrian couple Claudia and Daniel. We were told it takes four hours, actually, it took six. However, it was by far the most scenic and beautiful bus rid of my life. It felt like such a sin to be reading or typing as we drove through these magnificent mountains. They were so big and green. You expected to see dragons flying around them. We flew around corners too fast doing a dozen corkscrew turns at a time. The mini-bus was actually pretty comfortable and only half full.
We arrived and checked into Pan’s Place. We booked in advance as you must do for Vang Vieng it is a “must-do” stop on the backpacker trail. But the more you read up on it the more tragic you realise it is and that the stories you hear are actually true. The first night we had dinner in one of the local places. It had the sitcom “Friends” on a loop, forever as many restaurants here are known for, quite strange. We headed to the famous Saduka bar for the hour of free whiskeys. Anything free is a must when you are backpacking. It was rice whiskey, I had five, each with a different mixer. I finished with a couple crepes before heading home reasonably early.
The next day when I was meant to go tubing with the group, however, I was puking up all day instead. I wasn’t too bothered. The thought of alcohol was gross. That night I had an Irish stew at Gary’s Bar to sort my tummy, and it did the job well. Best Irish stew and closest to home I’ve felt in two years. I also got a massage, useless, waste of time and money, like being patted on the back for wind. Unfortunately being qualified in massage means you have high standards. I should have guessed by their spelling of Swedish…
The next day Freddie a Dutch girl and I headed on a big adventure. We went to two caves, one was the water cave where we went tubing. Full of Korean tourists which were a comedy act by itself. They made wolf howls easily for half an hour in the cave. Ugh. Every time they laughed harder as if it was the funniest thing since Mr Bean. The cave was pretty cool though and we pulled ourselves along by rope so a bit of exercise as the current was strong.
Next, we went to the famous elephant cave which was literally barely a cave. We snapped a few shots and chatted walking on the way with Daniela and Jackie exchanging travel stories. Oh, and we had lunch at the crazy early time of eleven. It was great food though. We did half an hour on the back of a truck to the kayaking spot.
Our guide T was a funny guy. We got our paddles and made a circle for a paddle talk. It was so strange to watch, memories of my experience as an outdoor instructor and giving paddle talks to kids at summer camps flooded back. It turned out actually we were in double kayaks, open-top which was strange as there were some small rapids. No wonder people get swept down the river. We had no life jackets, only some people did, Asia eh.
It was brilliant fun! We did two or three hours with a break at a tubing bar along the way. The river was very fast flowing so you didn’t have to do much of work. The sun beat down strongly and we covered up best we could. Malaria meds making you more susceptible to sunburn apparently, and I defo don’t need that.
I was happy to be leaving the following day. When I walked into the hostel, people are moping around, very down all coping with the worst come down or hangover of their lives. I did not want to be like that or around that. People would party there for weeks and by Asian standards, it wasn’t that cheap. It’s just not me. These days there are only three bars on the river open for tubing as the death count got too high in 2011. 27 backpackers died and many more who got transferred to the hospital in Vientiane. There were up to ten backpackers a day with broken bones, severe alcohol and drug poisoning. The hospital was not equipped. The saddest part is how it changed the town. The locals now believe there is bad karma in the river because of all the dead foreigners. So they don’t wash their clothes, bathe, fish or let their kids play in it anymore. I was glad to leave. Rumours that it is getting less and less popular as a drinking/drug spot are hopefully correct.
theaccidentalbackpacker 
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